As the admin of a Facebook group of 38,000 moms I see the absolute best in people. I see women reaching out to form a support group for their fellow moms. I see women donating their formula, breast milk, clothes, toys and money to moms who are in need. I see moms who reach out to me because they are genuinely concerned for another mom and want to know how they are doing after a difficult situation. I see the best in humanity and this was the reason for me starting a support group for moms.
On the other hand, some days, like today, I see the absolute worst in humanity. I see moms taking screen shots of other moms posts (taken out of context) in order to make their post go viral and push their own agenda. I see moms tearing each other down because they feel as if they can do it better and are holier than thou. I see moms shame other moms because they aren't pretty enough, skinny enough, don't breastfeed, don't formula feed, don't vaccinate, do vaccinate, don't circumcise, do circumcise etc. Where have we gone wrong as a society?
Now, as I have previously mentioned, my groups is comprised of moms. That is literally the only demographic I have in my group, yet some of these moms act like children and quite frankly it scares me that they are raising our next generation. If you are a bully do you think you are going to raise a compassionate child? If you are an ugly person on the inside do you think that your child will be able to see through that ugliness and become a better person? If you are constantly negative do you think you will raise a child to be positive? My answer to all of these is an astounding "NO!" Children emulate what they see in their everyday lives so why not show them the best in you? Just like children want to put make up on like their moms or mow the lawn like their dads, they want you to show them a positive path in life. (Yes, these are stereotypical roles so of course dads can put on make up and moms can mow a lawn but I was just giving examples.)
If you are one of those moms that feel as if you have to shame others then what you really need to do is take a look on the inside. What is missing within yourself that you feel you need to tear apart someone else? What is making you so sad that you feel as if you want to project that sadness and hate on to others? What do you need to change in your life to make yourself happy? Most importantly, why can't you be the positive change you want to see in the world?
There is a very famous book entitled "Everything I Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten." Perhaps some moms should live their lives in this manner and remember what they learned so long ago in Kindergarten? "Play fair. Don't hit people. (Physically or mentally) Say you're sorry when you hurt somebody. Live a balanced life." ~Robert Fulghum
Wouldn't the world be a nicer place if we all lived by these principles? Best of all wouldn't the world be a nicer place if we taught these lessons to our children so the next generation of women can support each other no matter their differences?